What is wrong with me?

I've been having a real problem with the whole Christmas spirit thing this year. I did send out Christmas cards, and the ones I've received are taped around a doorway, but that is the only hint of Christmas at my house. I didn't put up a tree, didn't hang a single garland, or string a single light. There's not even a wreathe on my door. My house is the single dark spot in the neighborhood - everyone else is quite festive.

It's worse than that though. I had the whole weekend to get ready to leave for home this Christmas. Did I clean the house? Finish shopping? Wrap gifts? Pay bills? Unload random crap from the jeep? Do laundry? Anything productive?? Nope. Not a damn thing. I curled up on the couch with a bunch of books and didn't move, unless I was getting more coffee.

I did manage to get some stuff done this week. Shopping's done. Laundry's done. Then I got home last night from work, found "The Bourne Supremacy" on TV and curled up on the couch again. And, instead of being ready to leave when the alarm roused me from slumber first thing this morning, I smacked the alarm, rolled over, and went back to sleep. When I finally crawled out of bed this morning, I started cleaning.

Here's the thing though... Before I leave to start the 12 hour drive to get home, I still have dishes to wash, the main floor to sweep, trash to take out, packing to do, wrapping to do, unload the jeep, reload the jeep, clean out the cat box, gather together everything to take home, organize bills to pay sometime this week, etc etc etc. And am I doing it? Nope. Sitting here playing online.

I just don't want to go. I don't particularly want to stay here either, but I have never been so unenthused about a holiday before. What is my problem?

But to everyone out there who's a bit more into the season, I hope you have a wonderful Christmas!